101 Questions to Ask New Friends to Get to Know Them

Small talk helps you meet someone. Deeper questions help you actually get to know them. These 101 questions go one step beyond “What do you do?” — they invite stories, opinions, dreams, and laughter. They are friendly, not intrusive, and they work for new classmates, coworkers, neighbors, hobby groups, and anyone you would like to turn from an acquaintance into a real friend.

Use them over coffee, on a walk, during a lunch break, or in a group hangout. You do not need to ask all 101. Pick a few, listen to the answers, and share your own. For lighter openers, see 101 Small Talk Topics for Making Friends and 101 Small Talk Topics for Introverts. For starting conversations with people you have just met, How to Start a Conversation With a Stranger Without Being Awkward and 101 Tips for Starting a Conversation With a Stranger can help.

A good rule: if you ask a question, be ready to answer it too. Friendship grows when sharing goes both ways.

About this article: use these questions to turn a first chat into a real connection — pick a few, listen, and follow up on what they share.

How This Article Was Put Together

This list was built from questions people commonly ask when getting to know someone new — friendly openers that invite real answers without prying. We grouped them by flow: easy first questions, getting to know each other, fun and lighthearted, deeper conversation, and would-you-rather choices. Each question was checked for clarity, kept respectful and low-pressure, and duplicates were removed so all 101 stand on their own. Written by the 101Thing team and reviewed for clarity and safety.

About This Article

This article is part of the 101 Thing library of practical lists and guides, and it focuses on questions to Ask New Friends to Get to Know Them. Its sections — including “Easy Starters — Beyond Small Talk” and “Interests and Favorites” — are organised so you can jump straight to the part that matches your situation and use it right away. Treat everything here as a starting point rather than a script: adapt the wording to your own voice, skip anything that does not fit, and put your own experience ahead of any list. We update our articles when we find errors or a better approach, and readers are welcome to suggest corrections through our contact page. For more on how we research and check the content we publish, see our Editorial Policy.

Easy Starters — Beyond Small Talk

1. What is something you have been enjoying lately?
2. What is a hobby you have been getting into?
3. What is your favorite way to spend a free evening?
4. What is one thing you are looking forward to this month?
5. What is a show, book, or podcast you would recommend?
6. What is your favorite way to unwind after a long day?
7. What is something you are curious to try with friends right now?
8. What is a small thing that made your week better?
9. What is your favorite meal to cook or order?
10. What is one thing you do that always lifts your mood?
11. What is a place in your city you love and would recommend?
12. What is your favorite way to spend time with friends?
13. What is something you have learned recently?
14. What is a skill you have that people might not guess?
15. What is your favorite season, and what do you love about it?
16. What is one thing a friend did today that you are grateful for?
17. What is a song you and your friends always end up singing together?
18. What is your favorite way to start a weekend?
19. What is something you are working on that excites you?
20. What is one thing you would like to do more of this year?

Interests and Favorites

21. What is your favorite book of all time, and why?
22. What is your favorite movie you could watch again and again?
23. What is a TV show you think everyone should watch?
24. What kind of music do you love most?
25. What is your favorite sport to watch or play?
26. What is your favorite food, and is there a story behind it?
27. What is your favorite place you have ever traveled to?
28. What is a hobby you would love to try one day?
29. What is your favorite board game, card game, or video game?
30. What is your favorite outdoor activity to do with friends?
31. What is your favorite way to exercise, if you enjoy it?
32. What is a favorite childhood show, book, or game you still love?
33. What is your favorite dessert to share with friends?
34. What is a restaurant or cafe you love and would take a friend to?
35. What is your favorite holiday, and how do you like to celebrate it?
36. What is a topic you could talk about for hours?
37. What is your favorite animal, and why?
38. What is a creative hobby you enjoy — drawing, music, writing, cooking, or something else?
39. What is your favorite way to spend a rainy day?
40. What is a favorite memory tied to one of your interests?
41. What is a new interest you have picked up in the last year?
42. What is your favorite thing about your hometown or current city?
43. What is a favorite quote, lyric, or saying that means something to you?
44. What is your favorite way to learn something new?
45. What is one thing you are a little bit obsessed with right now?

Life Stories

46. Where did you grow up, and what was it like?
47. What is a favorite memory from school?
48. What is the best trip you have ever taken with friends?
49. What is a challenge a friend helped you get through that you are grateful for?
50. What is a funny story from your life you love telling?
51. What was your first job, and what did you learn from it?
52. What is a moment with a friend that changed how you see things?
53. What is a tradition from your family that you love?
54. What is the most interesting place you have ever visited?
55. What is a time when you tried something new and loved it?
56. What is a memory with your friends that still makes you smile?
57. What is something you did as a kid that you would love to do again?
58. What is a time when you felt really proud of yourself?
59. What is a lesson you learned from a mistake?
60. What is a small kindness a friend showed you that you still remember?
61. What is a time when a stranger made your day better?
62. What is one thing you used to believe that you have changed your mind about?
63. What is a favorite memory from the last year?
64. What is something you have done that surprised even yourself?
65. What is a story from your life that says a lot about who you are?

Values and Dreams

66. What matters most to you in a long-term friendship?
67. What is one value that matters most to you in a friendship?
68. What does a good day with friends look like for you?
69. What is one goal you are working toward?
70. What is something you love doing with friends that never gets old?
71. What kind of people do you enjoy having in your friend group?
72. What is one dream you would love to chase with a friend by your side?
73. What is something you want to get better at with a friend’s help?
74. What is one cause you would love to volunteer for with friends?
75. What is a quality you admire most in a friend?
76. What is one thing you would like your friends to remember you for?
77. What does a happy friendship look like to you?
78. What is one thing you would like to learn together with a friend?
79. What is a small habit that makes your life better?
80. What is one thing you hope to do in the next five years?
81. What is something you believe that not everyone agrees with?
82. What is one thing you would like to teach others one day?
83. What is a change you would like to see in the world?
84. What is one thing about your friends that inspires you?
85. What is a dream you have never told many people about?

Fun Hypotheticals

86. If you could invite anyone to a group dinner with friends, who would you add to the table?
87. If your whole friend group moved to one city for a year, which city would you vote for?
88. If your friend group won a small lottery together, what is the first fun thing you would all do?
89. If you could have one superpower just for helping friends, what would it be?
90. If you could time travel with a friend, would you visit the past or the future together?
91. If our friend group could be characters in a show for a day, who would you want to play?
92. If you could learn one language to use with friends on a group trip, which would you pick?
93. If you and your friends starred in a movie together, what kind of movie would it be?
94. If our group got a shared pet for the office or class, what animal would you pick?
95. If you and your friends could invent a holiday to celebrate together, what would it be?
96. If your friendship had a theme song, what would it be?
97. If you could swap jobs with a friend for a day to understand their work, whose job would you try?
98. If you could plan a weekend road trip with friends, where would you take the group?
99. If your friend group started a band for one night, which instrument would you play?
100. If you could have a free month to do anything, what would you do?
101. What is one question you wish new friends would ask you?

How to Use These Questions With New Friends

• Start light, go deeper gradually. Begin with Easy Starters and Interests. Move to Life Stories and Values only as trust grows.
• Share your own answers. If you ask about a dream or a memory, share yours too. One-sided questioning feels like an interview.
• Follow up. “Tell me more about that” and “What was that like?” turn a question into a real conversation.
• Watch for comfort. If a question feels too personal, move on gracefully. Good friends respect boundaries.
• Use them in groups too. In a group hangout, pick one question and go around. Keep answers to a minute or two each.
• Do not rush. You do not need to get through a list in one meeting. Friendship builds over many small conversations.
• End positively. The last question — “What is one question you wish new friends would ask you?” — is a great closer. It invites the other person to steer the conversation.

For making friends as an adult, pair these with 101 Tips for Making Friends as an Adult, How to Make Friends in a New City as an Adult, and How to Make Friends as an Adult When You Work From Home. For meeting people through shared activities, 101 Hobbies That Help You Meet People and 101 Low-Pressure Hobbies for Introverts to Meet People can help. For deeper relationship questions later on, 101 Deep Questions to Ask Your Girlfriend goes further.

Sources & Further Reading

Want to go deeper? These reputable sources cover the ideas behind this article.

• Psychology Today — The 36 questions research on deepening ties with people you already know.
• American Psychological Association — Why conversations matter for well-being and connection.

From Questions to Friendship: What Happens Next

The questions open the door; the follow-up walks through it. One great conversation doesn’t make a friend — repeated contact does.

• End with a specific plan, not a vague promise. “Want to check out that [place] next Saturday?” beats “we should hang out sometime.”
• Be the one who texts first. Everyone’s waiting for the other person to reach out. Break the stalemate.
• Suggest low-commitment second hangs. Coffee, a walk, a market — easy yeses build the habit of saying yes.
• It’s okay if some don’t stick. Not every good conversation becomes a friendship. The ones that do are worth the misses.

The Follow-Up Formula

• Within 48 hours: reference something from the conversation. “You mentioned that bakery — I tried it, you were right.”
• Within two weeks: propose something concrete. Vague “let’s hang” dies; “farmers market Saturday?” lives.
• Remember one detail and ask about it later. “How did the presentation go?” Being remembered is the fastest path to closeness.

Frequently Asked Questions

How are these different from small talk?

Small talk is light and safe — weather, weekend plans, favorites. These questions go one step deeper: stories, values, dreams, and what matters to someone. They help you move from polite chat to real connection.

How many questions should I ask in one conversation?

Three to five is plenty, with real follow-up. A good conversation is not a checklist. Let it wander.

What if someone gives a short answer?

That is fine. Not everyone opens up quickly. Thank them, share your own answer, and move on. Trust builds over time, not in one chat.

Are these questions good for group settings?

Yes. Pick one question and let everyone answer briefly. They work for clubs, classes, team lunches, and study groups. Keep it optional — always allow a pass.

What if a question feels too personal?

Skip it. Stick to Easy Starters and Interests until you know someone better. If you are unsure, ask yourself: “Would I be comfortable answering this?” If not, do not ask it.

Can I use these over text?

Yes, for lighter questions. For deeper Life Stories and Values questions, in person or on a call is usually better, because tone matters. Text is great for follow-ups like, “I was thinking about what you said — tell me more.”

Conclusion

Getting to know a new friend does not happen in one big conversation. It happens in small moments — a shared story here, a dream there, a laugh over a hypothetical. These 101 questions give you a way to start those moments. Ask a few, listen well, share your own answers, and let friendship grow at its own pace. The best friendships are built on curiosity, kindness, and showing up again and again.

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